It's that time again; the Holiday Season. Where all the family members get together to give thanks and share a lifetime of memories that will last forever. BULLSHIT!!! Now is the time to sit in traffic on the highways, get molested by TSA to be shoved into a flying cattle car called airplanes that you overpaid for to be with a bunch of people you don't really care for. Let's look at the typical American family:
-Dad: Drinks too much and hits mom because of her bad cooking and lack of sex.
-Mom: Pops too many pills and sleeps around with both men and women.
-The kids: Misdiagnosed ADD, ADHD, learning Disabled, retarded, etc. because the schools are too lazy to do the proper job. Has every toy imaginable because mom and dad are too lazy to raise their kids.
-Grandpa: Was never afraid to use the belt at the drop of a hat. Became very upset when blacks moved into the neighborhood decades ago.
-Grandma: Kept head in sand for decades as grandpa beat kids and lamented about minorities.
-"Strange Uncle": Every family has one. This is the man that lives at home with mom and dad so long that mom and dad dies. This uncle never gets married, never has a steady girlfriend, and is court ordered to stay 500 feet away from schools due to a "misunderstanding." This uncle coaches and officiate baseball games, soccer games, Pop Warner football games, and hockey games despite not having any kids, having no athletic ability, and being in terrible shape.
There you have it folks; Happy Holidays America!